


Getting Here

by ShamelessPeterPan (PiscesDragon)



Series: Before They Were Kings [1]
Category: Chinese Actor RPF, 陈情令 | The Untamed (TV) RPF
Genre: Character Study, Gen, Masturbation, Pre-CQL, Secret Crush, Social Media, bjyx - Freeform, innocent Weibo stalking
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-28
Updated: 2020-05-28
Packaged: 2021-03-03 01:35:27
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 8,060
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24416731
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/PiscesDragon/pseuds/ShamelessPeterPan
Summary: It took a year to get here, to this table. A year of pining his way through a ridiculous crush, working and begging for favors, just to find himself once again beside the man in the chair to his right.When Xiao Zhan turned to him, shining that sunshine smile on Yibo for the first time in months, there was no doubt in his mind.It was worth it. It had all been worth it.OR: When Wang Yibo meets Xiao Zhan for the first time, the crush that develops leads him on a journey of determination — to put himself into the man’s path, no matter what it takes.
Relationships: Wang Yi Bo/Xiao Zhan, Wang Yibo & TTXS Geges, Wang Yibo & Wang Han
Series: Before They Were Kings [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1884685
Comments: 40
Kudos: 430





	Getting Here

**Author's Note:**

> This fic was largely inspired by [this video](https://youtu.be/i1rO2pKNMTg) and conversations with T, Ven, and Shira on Twitter… Thanks to them for broadening my horizons! I’d never considered there might have been something going on with GG and DD before CQL until I watched the video -- it’s well done, and I highly recommend it to all BXG fans!
> 
> All secondary characters (aside from TTXS brothers) in the story are completely fictional; names are made up and not related to anyone who may work with Wang Yibo or on CQL. I have little to no knowledge of how the casting/audition process works, so please forgive any errors with the technicalities.

It took a year to get here, to this table. A year of pining his way through a ridiculous crush, working and begging for favors, just to find himself once again beside the man in the chair to his right.

When Xiao Zhan turned to him, shining that sunshine smile on Yibo for the first time in months, there was no doubt in his mind.

It was worth it. It had all been worth it.

And Yibo would not mess up the golden opportunity he’d been given. He would work hard and put his best effort into every line, action, and scene he was given. He would find a way to impress Xiao Zhan with his skills and abilities.

And most of all, Yibo would enjoy every  _ minute _ he was graced with the gorgeous man’s company.

^^^^^^^^^^

It was another day, another episode, and Wang Yibo was trying to psych himself up for the show. After a year on the stage of  _ Day Day Up, _ he still hadn’t gotten totally comfortable in his role. Being in front of the audience was never a problem — it was the talking which was expected that always gave him trouble. 

Wang Yibo was a perfectionist, and it had served him well in his life so far. Dancing was a skill that could be honed with practice — a routine seared into his muscles until his brain didn’t have to think about the movements. And that was a good thing. He’d found, when he was younger, that his brain couldn’t always be trusted in high-pressure situations.

The problem was that there was no room for perfection in the art of conversation. There was no way to practice, to know what others would say. If he didn’t perceive what was coming, Yibo couldn’t prepare his response. So talking to people was consistently a challenge, because he was always so busy trying to guess what the person would say and plan ahead for his own “part” that Yibo struggled with paying attention to the words coming out of the other person’s mouth.

As he would eventually learn much later in life, listening was just as important as talking when it came to holding an actual conversation with people.

On top of that, Yibo didn’t trust that what he had to say was worthwhile. Too many wrong answers given when he’d been called upon in class as a young child — and the severe response that always followed from the  _ laoshi _ — had instilled in Yibo a fear of answering questions that often resulted in an uncontrollable stutter. He was timid, afraid he would be wrong. Even now, at nineteen years old with over five years of experience in the entertainment industry, he had gotten better at managing it, but his words would often fail him.

In truth, Yibo still had no idea how he’d managed to land a job as one of the hosts of a daytime talk show of all things. He had come to assume they just needed a younger guy to be the dancing monkey.

So that’s what Yibo did. If he couldn’t carry his weight by taking part in the conversations on the show, he was determined to do his best at every single task and performance they gave him. He would work hard to make sure his brothers didn’t regret adding him to their group. They were good men, and kind to Yibo in taking him under their wings, and he would be damned if he disappointed them.

The door to his dressing room snapped open with a short knock, and Da Zhang Wei’s head popped through the opening. “You ready, kid?”

Yibo took one more quick glance in the mirror, tousling his chestnut hair, then grabbed the white button-down shirt left hanging on the rack. He’d learned early on he was expected to wear whatever they set out for him and not to even think about having an opinion on it. Luckily, Yibo was no stranger to modeling and very accustomed to being treated as a human hanger.

“Yep! Right behind you, Da-Laoshi,” Yibo answered as he threw his arms into the sleeves and followed the older man down to the meeting room. There was a large crowd, much bigger than normal, milling around before the show began, making introductions and chatting before moving out to the stage for the taping. “Wow! So many people today! I thought we just had a boy band and a few other guests.”

Da-Loashi chuckled. “Yeah, well there are  _ nine _ singers in that group, so we’ve got almost enough young men around today for a soccer team!”

“That is… a  _ lot _ of guys for a group,” Yibo said faintly. He distantly remembered the vocal group on the show today was called X-Nine, so he guessed the number made sense. His gege gave him a pat on the shoulder and wandered off to greet the guests with a bright smile, so Yibo glanced around the room to see if any of the guys looked familiar. It wouldn’t be impossible, given that they all ran in similar circles. Promotions, interviews, performances, and acting jobs had a strange tendency to throw you in with the same people repeatedly, especially if they were all idols.

Not seeing anyone he knew, Yibo made his way through basic introductions with one of the members, Guo Zifan, and was preparing for his personal kryptonite of small talk when the director’s voice over the speaker called them all to the stage. With a sigh of relief, Yibo smiled and gave a small bow of farewell to the singer before making his way past a couple of female guests to trail behind his co-host brothers as they left the room.

“This should be a fun show for you today, Wang Yibo!” Wang Han commented as they got into position backstage to make their entrance. “Lots of young men to join you on the program.”

Yibo’s eyes widened in fear, his heart racing as if it were suddenly trying to crawl out of his chest through his throat.  _ What had the older man heard? _ He hadn’t even been involved with anybody since leaving Korea a year ago!  _ How could they KNOW?! _

Qian Feng’s hand dropped to Yibo’s shoulder with a laugh. “Yeah, Didi, we’ll have a few more guys to drag into doing the rigorous stuff. With that many available, maybe you won’t even have to dance today!”

All the tension left Yibo’s body in a rush, and he pulled a breath into his lungs.  _ They hadn’t been referencing his personal life, thank GOD. _

If he’d been thinking — and not panicking — Yibo would have known better. His brothers had done nothing else since he’d joined the show but attempt to get him a date with every halfway attractive young girl who’d set foot on their stage.

As the show began, Yibo bounced out on stage to the music, trying to build the energy for the show to help pump up the audience. It was very similar to the way his band would make their entrance for a concert, creating movements to draw the eye and engage the people watching.

After they’d gotten to center stage and made their regular introductions, Yibo and his brothers all moved to stand off to the side while the audience watched a pre-taped song segment, which they had done a few days ago in a canola field. He didn’t focus on the video too much, just let the song drift through his head as he ran through the task list for the day’s show in his head. The more prepared he was, the better he could perform in the show. Glancing up at the screen, Yibo vaguely remembered the fact that they hadn’t been the only group using the field that day. He hadn’t realized the X-Nine group had been recording there as well.

It wasn’t until the video finished up and the band stood in a line on stage that Yibo got a chance to really examine all of its members. While the hosts gave the audience full of young girls a moment to quiet down, Yibo took a minute to relax and let his eyes skim down the line of singers. They were a mixed bag — different heights and ages, all slim and fit, a few could possibly be considered cute. He’d almost completed his assessment when his gaze fell on a boy not quite at the end and froze in a trance.

He was  _ glorious. _ One of the tallest members in the line, with inky black hair, sharp features, and wearing a dark pink jacket that almost matched the nervous flush on his cheeks. The makeup team had made his face very pale, of course, but Yibo appreciated that the boy’s arms had a caramel glow. Though Yibo was used to receiving generous compliments on his own fair complexion, he’d always found a natural color more attractive on other men. 

He was startled out of his temporary distraction when the line of men began doing a little move to present their vocal group, and Yibo moved to mimic them in a desperate attempt to dispel the nervous energy suddenly jumping through his body.

They moved quickly into giving individual introductions of the singers, and knowing Wang Han would be taking the lead for a while, Yibo’s focus slipped immediately back onto the boy in pink.

He looked young.  _ Probably nearly the same age as me, _ Yibo thought hopefully. Poised and polite, the boy was paying close attention not only to his fellow members but Wang Han and the other hosts as well. He gave an encouraging little grin to his fellow band member to his right as his turn came to speak, indicating his care toward the others in his group.

_ Could he be into guys? _ Yibo wondered.  _ Could I get that lucky? _

He was in a boy band with nine other guys so statistically, and based on his own experiences, Yibo felt sure there was at least a chance of it. Plus, Wenhan always liked to joke that Yibo was pretty enough that he could get anybody he wanted, including straight men and lesbians — and while Yibo hadn’t had much opportunity to test that theory, he wasn’t opposed to evaluating it in this particular case. Even if he was straight, a guy that handsome was welcome to  _ experiment _ in Yibo’s bed as much as he wanted.

When it was finally the boy’s turn to talk, his voice was smooth with a deep quality to it that Yibo hadn’t expected. After introducing himself as Xiao Zhan, the boy gave a cutesy description of his role in the group and then pointed to the audience with a gorgeous bright smile that made all the girls in the room squeal in delight.

He really was the most beautiful person Yibo had ever seen.

A hot coil of lust twisted around in his stomach, turning his insides to mush and making his knees feel as loose as they did after many hours of dance practice. His grip on the microphone tightened, trying to ground himself in reality, as Yibo realized he’d never been this instantly attracted to anyone in his entire life.

It was a jarring experience to be having on television and in front of a live studio audience. But then, what else should Yibo have expected from the wild ride that was his life?

As the crowd screamed, Yibo joined them internally but managed to keep his own fangirling contained. He couldn’t stop the smile from escaping as Wang Han and Da-Laoshi joked with Xiao Zhan about his “electric” appeal, for once trying to join in on something without direct prompting from one of the other brothers.

Soon after, the X-Nine group moved off to the side of the stage and the other two guests on the show that day came out to be introduced. With the person making his palms sweat sitting safely out of the way behind him, Yibo could focus on his job again. Though he was still uncomfortably aware of the fact that there was an extremely handsome man who could see every move he made, which made him even more self conscious than normal.

The rest of the first few segments of the show sped along as Yibo tried to be a good host and hopefully impress Xiao Zhan in the process. If he glanced back over to where the group of boys was seated a few times as he moved around the stage, he was sure it didn’t look too obvious. He was just doing his part to acknowledge them, right?

The remaining hours of the taping flew by quicker than almost any show Yibo had done before. Stealing glances across the stage kept him busy, though distracted enough that Da-laoshi needed to get his attention a few times and prompt him to stay focused. The few times Xiao Zhan came near him, either for an activity or just standing around on the stage, nervous butterflies erupted in Yibo’s stomach that he fought to quell. When Wang Han prompted him into a quick dance battle with one of the other X-Nine guys, he took advantage of the opportunity to show off his best skill. Throughout the show, Yibo resisted the urge to admire the boy when he got too close, afraid he’d be caught staring and would blow any chance he had of actually speaking with him after the show.

Unfortunately, that chance never came.

They finished up the taping, and the guests said their farewells to him and his brothers and began to head backstage to grab some refreshments before heading out. Yibo was ready to head back with them, after convincing himself he could manage extended social interaction with nine men who all knew each other as long as it meant getting to talk to one gorgeous one for just a few minutes. But he was stopped by Wang Han, who grabbed his arm and informed him they had a few promotional videos that needed to be shot. Yibo only had just enough time for a trip to wardrobe for a quick change and a stop at makeup to touch up his face before they needed to get started.

As usual, any desire Yibo had for a social life would have to wait.

*****

He couldn’t stop thinking about Xiao Zhan. That smile was haunting him, and like an addict needing a fix, he only lasted a day before cracking and looking up the man’s Weibo page. He briefly considered following him from his official page, with the hope it might give him another opening to interact with him.

The dream bloomed in his mind for a brief moment. Xiao Zhan would see Yibo’s follow and follow back, out of professional courtesy. He seemed like the type of person who would do that, and probably knew enough by now to recognize how important contacts were in their industry. He’d send Yibo a WeChat request, to be nice or mention he’d seen Yibo followed his account. That would get the ball rolling and they could have a conversation, getting to know each other without it happening in person where Yibo could potentially embarrass himself. It would be perfect.

But what if he didn’t recognize that Yibo’s account had followed him? X-Nine was surely gaining popularity every day, Xiao Zhan  _ must _ be gaining fans to the point he’d begun ignoring the notifications. Yibo had turned his off years ago, learning to only pay attention to the numbers to ensure they hadn’t dropped significantly.

Or worse, what if the man did notice but ignored it? Yibo had done enough research to learn that Xiao Zhan was twenty-five, far older than he looked, and probably had the maturity to go along with it. Why would he want to bother with a teenager like Yibo? He already had plenty of didi’s in his group, guys he hung out with every day. Would he truly have any interest in getting to know one more?

In the end, Yibo’s fear of rejection — a relatively new and foreign experience for him — led him to use his private, anonymous account for his “fan” activities. It was better that way, he decided. He would be able to like, comment and interact to his heart’s content without fear of anyone knowing he was a fanboy or causing unnecessary drama because of it. He was free to watch Xiao Zhan’s career unfold from a distance, and with luck, they would run into each other again in the future.

*****

Xiao Zhan was quickly becoming a fixation. Every spare moment Yibo could find, he was seeking out any little tidbit of information he could. Their age difference, which was easy to forget given Xiao Zhan’s youthful appearance, did nothing to deter Yibo. He’d spent his life around geges, to the point he preferred them in all honesty. Older men tended to cut him a break due to his youth, not expecting too much from him, and often went out of their way to make his life easier. At times, being the  _ maknae _ surrounded by geges that wanted to baby him had been aggravating, but Yibo had learned to embrace and eventually enjoy the special treatment.

Besides his age and obvious good looks, there were a lot of things about Xiao Zhan that Yibo was intrigued by. For one thing, he hadn’t followed the standard training route of most other idols. He’d only been in the business a relatively short time, having first gone to college and getting a degree in design. He had even worked a regular job in the business world before switching gears into entertainment.

_ What would make a person do that? _ Yibo wondered. He found himself completely fascinated by the mystery, and he couldn’t help but want to unravel it and figure out how Xiao Zhan’s mind worked.

Alone at night, in what was generally a hotel room because he rarely seemed to spend much time at his own home, Yibo would pull up Xiao Zhan’s videos and interviews on his phone. As he observed his interaction with the group, he would soak in the smile that somehow managed to warm him from the inside just by way of the tiny screen. In games on variety shows, Yibo recognized the man was competitive, much like Yibo himself. He always pushed to win, no matter what stupid or ridiculous thing the hosts had concocted for him to do.

A few times, Yibo was incredibly relieved he avoided viewing the videos of Xiao Zhan in public. One of the shows had the man and one of his bandmates playing the pocky stick game — essentially a game of gay chicken to test how close they were willing to bring their mouths together before stopping. Xiao Zhan either had very little sense of self preservation or a competitive streak so strong it overrode any fear he had of invading Peng Chuyue’s personal space. Xiao Zhan bit off the pocky stick right against the other man’s  _ teeth, _ definitely making their lips touch (though the camera cut away quickly to prevent showing anything inappropriate). That combined with how close the two men were standing and touching each other was so hot Yibo had to turn off the video and set his phone out of reach.

He was so turned on, he shoved a hand down his pants and stroked himself without even bothering with lube, his dick leaking so much he didn’t miss it. His mind imagining himself in the game, his mouth and body pressed up against Xiao Zhan, his heart racing as he jerked himself quickly to completion.

The suspicion that he’d truly become a sick little fanboy overwhelmed Yibo for a moment as he cleaned himself up. But he quickly rationalized that he was far from the first teenage boy to masturbate to thoughts of an idol. Hell, people probably did it thinking of  _ him _ all the time.

_ Wait. What if Xiao Zhan thought about  _ **_him_ ** _ like that? Pleasuring himself to thoughts of Yibo in his head? _

The idea set off a second round of stroking himself, lasting much longer, and wearing Yibo out so completely that when he was spent, he slept deep and restfully for the first time in weeks.

*****

It went on for months. Yibo obsessed about the man from the privacy of the internet, beginning to sense that he knew him even though they’d only met once. He saw Xiao Zhan’s kindness — toward the men he worked with, the fans, the staff around him — as well as the serious passion and determination that often burned in his eyes.

Yibo’s  _ favorite _ glimpse into the inner workings of Xiao Zhan were definitely his weekly vlogs.

It was obviously a task which had been set up and required by X-Nine’s management, and Xiao Zhan (along with the other few members whose vlogs Yibo had watched due to the older man’s guest appearances on them) implied strongly that providing the weekly videos was not something he found highly enjoyable.

Or possibly Yibo was just better at reading between the lines than most, given the fact that he was used to being required by his own management to do many things he had no desire to do. Live stream chats were a particular hellscape for Yibo, and he thought Xiao Zhan should be thankful he was only being asked to provide very short taped videos.

By the time late summer rolled around and Yibo had caught up on all the older footage, he had a sense that he already knew the older man. His likes, dislikes, where he came from, what he liked to eat, even his cat. Yibo even caught himself talking about Xiao Zhan to Da-Laoshi at work between sets or backstage, when something would come up that would remind him of a topic the singer had mentioned in a video. Da Zhangwei quickly caught on to Yibo’s new fan obsession, joking that since Yibo was a “fangirl” he could play matchmaker and get Xiao Zhan’s WeChat for him if he wanted.

Something about the combination of desire, mortification and flushed embarrassment must have been written all over Yibo’s face, because Da Zhangwei suddenly became serious and looked him over with a critical eye.

“Ahh,” he said knowingly, nodding his head and raising one eyebrow, which only made the panic in Yibo’s chest flutter worse. 

Yibo’s voice was a choked whisper, his throat closing up in anguish. “Don’t tell anyone.  _ Please.” _

“No worries, it’s cool!” Da-Laoshi reassured him, his voice light and teasing but his eyes betraying the fierce loyalty behind his words. He laid a firm hand on Yibo’s shoulder to settle him. “It’s cool! Crushes are normal, you know? Wang-xiong is just a normal teenage boy.”

Yibo’s entire body slumped, relaxing immediately at the easy acceptance and the way his gege had said the word “normal”, as if Yibo had nothing to be ashamed of. Relief flowed through him like water, and he had to fight the sudden urge to hug the older man and cling to him like a child.

Da Zhangwei’s smile dimmed just a touch, and he stared at Yibo, ensuring he had his full attention. “Just be careful you don’t let those hormones run you into trouble, got it?”

Yibo blinked, his head instantly moving to nod obediently. The message was extremely clear, requiring no further explanation. 

_ Don’t get caught. _

*****

His birthday rolled around, and while Yibo avoided celebrating it, he humored his TTXS brothers by pretending to enjoy the small party they’d thrown for him on set between tapings of the show. The one positive to his birthday was the official escape from his teenage years. They hadn’t been completely horrible, and he had achieved a lot and gained good friends with his bandmates, but there had been a great deal of blood, sweat, and tears to work through as well.

Yibo really hoped his twenties would go more smoothly.

So far though, the year had been extremely uneventful. Aside from his regular gigs with TTXS and modeling or promotions, few other projects or offers had popped up to keep him busy. His agent had so far had no luck in landing him anything substantial, so in the meantime Yibo kept busy with his hobbies. He’d recently become enamored with riding motorcycles, courtesy of his friend Yin Zheng, and he was quickly developing a passion for it. The one positive to having so much down time was the ability to take his bike out whenever he was back in Beijing and the weather was nice.

The free time also gave him the opportunity to keep tabs on Xiao Zhan through his social media accounts. He’d noticed the man had a real eye for photography, and his way of taking pictures of mundane objects or scenery but making them look interesting was very intriguing. Yibo found himself trying to copy the aesthetic with some of his own photos as he traveled to different places for filming of TTXS or modeling jobs, and he occasionally posted them to his public Weibo, secretly hoping Xiao Zhan might notice them. 

Yibo also took an interest in watching the X-Nine performances and music videos as they gradually hit the Internet. He wasn’t necessarily interested in the songs — a little too much pop for his personal taste — but the dancing certainly caught his eye. Or at least, the focused fan videos of one member in particular did.

Truth be told, Xiao Zhan was not the best dancer. He wasn’t a natural by any means, not the way most of the people were that Yibo worked with. But he obviously worked hard, and he kept up with the rest of his group and was far from the weakest dancer among them. Yibo admired the way he hit his choreographed marks, the way he seemed more comfortable with the more fluid movements of some of their dances. His long limbs moved more easily through delicate glides than sharp, staccato movements, which Yibo found interesting since his own preferences in dance ran completely counter to that.

While watching some of the videos, Yibo itched to help Xiao Zhan improve his dance skills, his fingers twitching to fix his positioning or posture through some of his movements. More than once, he’d fallen asleep watching the older man dance and dreamed of being his instructor — using his hands to move Xiao Zhan’s body the way he wanted, sliding his fingers gently across perfectly tanned skin, wrapping them tightly around his waist.

The following mornings  _ always _ involved an extended shower to clear his head and unwind the tension that had coiled within as he’d slept.

As the weather turned cooler and fall rolled in, Yibo heard through the grapevine that Xiao Zhan was up for a part in a new drama. Da Zhang Wei, of all people, was the one who brought it to Yibo’s attention.

“Are you going to get yourself a part in that new BL drama they’re casting?” Da-laoshi asked him one day as they hung around on set, waiting for the others to return from a quick break.

Yibo’s ears perked up at the news. As far as he knew, the government had recently stamped out any projects of that type in the works. Even some of those that had been airing already and were successful had gotten pulled.

“What?” Yibo asked. “What BL drama?”

Da-laoshi grinned at him knowingly. “I heard from some friends that guy Xiao Zhan was up for the lead in a new drama. I thought maybe you knew about it already.”

“No…” Yibo replied, gazing at him in surprise. “I hadn’t heard that.”

“Ah, well, you know they’re still casting for the other lead…” Da-laoshi said with a wink.

Yibo looked away, his mind whirling as he tried to remember if his agent had mentioned any project like this recently. He’s sure he would have remembered if someone suggested it to him, but with it being a BL story, there was a good chance his team had eliminated it from consideration on sight.

“I hear they’re looking for the strong, silent type,” Da-Laoshi continued with a smile. “The character is kind of aloof, doesn’t talk much… you know, has the whole  _ resting bitch face _ thing going for him. Know anybody like that we could recommend to the casting director?”

Da-laoshi laughed as Yibo stared at him blankly. It sounded like the part that was tailor made for him. No… he couldn’t get that lucky, could he? That the perfect part with the perfect co-star would drop out of the sky, just like that? Yibo had been blessed in a lot of ways in his short life, but this went way beyond too good to be true.

“Yibo?” Da-laoshi prompted after a few seconds of silence, a slight expression of concern on his face.

Wide eyes refocused on the older man, a look of wild, barely contained excitement making them glimmer under the stage lights.

“I’ve got to call my agent!” Yibo nearly yelled. He spun toward the side of the stage, ready to make a run to his dressing room for his phone.

Da-laoshi grabbed his arm, halting his forward movement and yanking him back to his designated spot beside him. “Not so fast, kid! Hang-ge is back. Time to work!”

*****

With a little persuasion, Yibo convinced his agent to submit his name for the project. They’d had little luck getting him parts in anything else this year besides a few guest appearances and one show he would start filming in December, so there wasn’t much argument to Yibo’s assertion that it couldn’t hurt to try. Even if he didn’t get the part, the casting directors might remember him for something else. They submit his head shots and information, expediting it by messenger due to Yibo’s insistence. It was rare for Yibo to demand anything, even more so when it came to the jobs his team procured for him. He wasn’t known to say “no” or even have much of an opinion, just doing whatever he was asked with little fuss.

His agent looked at him curiously, but didn’t argue, simply nodded his head and agreed to push for him.

Still, months passed with no word on the casting. By the end of the year, Yibo was getting antsy to know why he hadn’t heard anything. He began filming on his new project,  _ Super Talent, _ and it helped him to keep busy. But that BL project was still floating around in the back of his mind, like a ghost that haunted him. So when he got a call from his agent asking to meet at the Yuehua offices, Yibo was hoping it was good news.

“That drama you wanted… they weren’t interested in you for the lead,” Zhang Ming explained after they’d gotten the basic pleasantries out of the way. “They did mention they’ve got quite a few other smaller parts to fill. They’d be happy to have you come in to read for one of those.”

Yibo’s stomach dropped, disappointment settling like a heavy rock near his navel. 

“Who did they get for the lead?” he asked quietly, half afraid of the answer.

“Sounds like they’ve had a hard time lining up talent,” his agent said. “They wanted bigger names, but most idols aren’t willing to take the risk on a BL project right now. Especially with a new, untried production company. Honestly, you should be glad you didn’t get it… It’s a big risk, Yibo.”

“Who’d they get?” Yibo repeated, his competitive streak determined to find out who had beaten him.

“Well, they couldn’t get their first choice for the primary lead,” Zhan Ming answered. “Sounds like they’re going with somebody named Xiao Zhan, though he hasn’t officially signed yet. The other lead is still open.”

Yibo took a deep breath, letting it out slowly and quietly, reigning in the spike of adrenaline that shot through him. Xiao Zhan was the lead. His co-star was still not cast.

There was still a chance.

His eyes moved up to settle back on Zhang Ming, his stare cold and serious. “Submit me again.”

His agent’s eyes widened, startled. He’d obviously expected a different reaction from his client, probably the usual disinterest Yibo generally showed in his presence. “What?”

“Send them my stuff again,” Yibo repeated, daring the man to argue with him.

“But, but… Why?” the man stuttered.

Yibo shrugged, forcing an air of nonchalance. “I want it.”

His agent stared at him with a completely perplexed expression, but nodded in agreement. It might be futile, and by the look on Zhang Ming’s face  _ he _ certainly thought so. But as long as there was a chance, Yibo would push.

He always fought hard to accomplish his goals. And what he wanted right now more than anything was to work with Xiao Zhan. There was no way he would give up so easily.

*****

Another couple of months flew by, with Yibo scuttling back and forth across China from the drama set to the TTXS set, before he heard from his agent again. It was the very end of February, and he was spending the day in Changsha filming an episode of TTXS. As they wrapped up one segment and the crew prepped the stage for the next activity, Yibo snuck a glance at his phone and noticed a missed call from Zhang Ming. Unfortunately, he didn’t have enough time to sneak away and call him back.

By the time they wrapped up filming for the day, Yibo saw that his agent had called again, and having missed him twice, had left a voicemail message instead. Crossing his fingers, Yibo headed into the host lounge and hit play as he slid the phone up to his ear.

_ “Hey, Yibo. Just wanted to let you know that project, Chen Qing Ling is what it’s being called now… They declined again. They’ve filled most of the primary parts now, so there’s nothing else for you at this point. They must be really picky on this role though, because they  _ **_still_ ** _ haven’t filled that other lead. I don’t know who they think is going to fall out of the sky. I swear, I did everything I could. I’m still looking for other dramas for you too, but so far we haven’t had much luck with that either. Maybe acting isn’t going to be the path for you to focus on…” _

Yibo hung up the call before listening to the rest of his agent’s well-meaning but completely unhelpful spiel. His hand grasped tightly around his phone, shaking it at the floor while he resisted the urge to both throw it against the wall and cry in frustration.

“Fuck… fuck…” Yibo murmured. He raised his head and shouted to the ceiling of the empty room. “FUCK!!”

“Hey… Yibo-di,” a voice said quietly behind him.

Yibo jumped and whirled, eyes going wide and scared at the appearance of Wang Han in the doorway.  _ Shit,  _ he thought, this time managing to keep the expletive contained, though he was sure the feeling was clearly written on his face.

“What’s the matter, didi?” Wang Han asked kindly, waving a hand behind him as if shooing someone away and then moving to sit in his regular leather chair against the far side of the room.

“Sorry. I’m sorry,” Yibo gushed in embarrassment. He respected his brothers so much and always made sure his behavior on set lived up to what he knew they expected from him. He’d let down his guard for just a second, let his feelings and disappointment take control, and it had bitten him in the ass. The last person he wanted to see him being unprofessional was Wang Han. The man was quickly becoming like a second father to him. In some ways even more so, because Han-ge understood the entertainment business and the issues Yibo dealt with, much more than his own father ever could.

Wang Han brushed off the apology with a flick of his wrist and the hint of a smile. “It’s fine. We all have those days. What’s happened?”

Yibo collapsed into his own chair, feeling defeated. “There was a part I wanted. I didn’t get it. It’s no big deal.”

“Ah,” Wang Han said, nodding his head. “Some other  _ bigger deal _ got it?”

“No!” Yibo growled in aggravation, forgetting he shouldn’t be venting his professional problems at work. “That’s just it! They haven’t even cast it yet! And I just know I would be a great fit for this part.”

While he hadn’t gone so far as to read the entire novel the drama was based on, Yibo had done a little research on it in the gaps of his filming schedule. Acting in a drama meant a lot of small breaks of time spent waiting around, and over the last few months Yibo had been scouring the web to learn about Lan Wangji. Even without reading the book there were plenty of plot summaries and character analysis to be found, and Yibo quickly learned that he really was a very fascinating character. Lan Wangji was actually oddly similar to him in many ways — though cold and quiet, deep down he was extremely passionate.

“Did the audition not go well?” Wang Han asked, leaning forward with interest.

“I never even got one,” Yibo said sadly, pulling at a loose thread on the side of his pants. “My agent sent my information twice, but they didn’t even want to see me for it.”

“Hmm…” Wang Han hummed in thought. “What’s this show called?”

“ _ Chen Qing Ling, _ I think,” Yibo answered. He didn’t offer any more information, unsure how Han-ge would take the idea of one of his co-hosts starring in a BL drama. He could always cross that particular bridge if and when he needed to.

“I’m sure I could make a few calls and get them to meet with you,” Wang Han said. “It might be difficult to schedule the audition, though. Aren’t you busy finishing up that drama in the next few weeks? And then starting something else too, right?”

He was on track to wrap  _ Super Talent _ by mid-March, then Yibo would be taking on the role of mentor in a new talent show for female idol trainees.

Yibo nodded. “Yeah, I’ve got a lot going on. It doesn’t matter though. I can’t ask you to do that, Han-ge.”

“You’re not asking,” Wang Han said with a smile. “I’m offering.”

“Still, you don’t need to pull strings for me —”

“In this business, who you know matters. You know this,” Wang Han said seriously. His gaze was focused in that way he had when imparting wisdom he believed was important for Yibo to learn. “Getting you in the door won’t matter if your skills don’t measure up. But it doesn’t hurt to let people help you push on the door, especially when you haven’t yet made enough of a name for yourself that people will open it for you willingly.”

“But Han-ge —” Yibo started to argue again.

“Wang Yibo, you come here consistently, you do your job, even when your schedule is packed and you haven’t slept or you don’t feel well. You work hard, and I appreciate that,” Wang Han said kindly. “You’re a brother now, and we help each other. It costs me nothing to make some calls.”

Yibo sighed, giving in. He wasn’t going to argue with Han-ge, and it seemed ridiculous to do it over something as benevolent as letting the older man help him out professionally. “Thanks, Han-ge.”

“I’m not promising anything!” Wang Han insisted with a chuckle.

His smile soothed Yibo in a way that convinced him that ultimately, getting the part didn’t matter that much. He had this job, his brothers, and their support. In the grand scheme of things, life was still pretty good.

“I know,” Yibo replied with a smile. “Thanks.”

*****

In the end, Wang Han had done more than just make calls to get him an audition, though Yibo wasn’t supposed to know that. Feng-ge accidentally let slip to him that Han-ge had actually ended up calling in a favor from some higher up buddy of his, a financial partner in the production company running the  _ Chen Qing Ling _ project.

The fact that Wang Han was willing to do such a thing only increased Yibo’s determination to do his best and land the part. He couldn’t waste his brother’s effort or tarnish his reputation by flubbing the audition. There was now much more than just Yibo’s ambitions hanging in the balance.

Still, his desire for the part had solidified into a solid burning kernel in his chest just the week before, when he’d gotten the news that Xiao Zhan had officially signed on to the project. They were just hitting a wall with casting his co-lead, and with filming scheduled to begin soon, they were getting desperate.

Yibo was convinced it was fate — they just needed to give him a chance. He could BE Lan Wangji. He knew it. There were times his overconfidence was less than helpful, but he felt sure that, in this case, his belief in his abilities was warranted.

It was nearly impossible to squeeze the trip to Beijing into his tight schedule, but he made it work. His manager was less than impressed with changes to his itinerary, but she arranged for his flights without forcing him to do it himself, so Yibo took that as a win.

He’d just started work on Produce 101 in Hangzhou, but on the 27th of March he had just enough free hours to be able to fly to Beijing, audition for  _ Chen Qing Ling, _ and then catch a flight to Changha for TTXS filming the following day.

He could sleep when he was dead. Or on the plane, if he was lucky.

When Yibo got to the offices where the casting was taking place, he was surprised to see his agent had shown up to accompany him. Though Zhang Ming seemed to want to make small talk, Yibo wasn’t interested. He put in his headphones, cueing up a zen playlist he’d created to help get himself in a more “Lan Wangji” mindset, and ignored the man next to him. He hoped the fact that his agent showed up was a good sign — maybe Zhang Ming thought he had a better chance at the part now that his feet were literally in the door. When the staff came out to greet Yibo and escort him back, Zhang Ming stood as if to come along, but Yibo waved him back to wait outside. The last thing he wanted was to look like a child who needed his agent to hold his hand while he went into an audition. 

With his invisible cloak of cool rigidity in place, Yibo embraced his confidence and stepped into the room with what he hoped was a commanding presence. As usual, he was very quiet and formal when nervous, but it seemed to work to his benefit for once, if the bemused look on the producer’s face as they politely made their way through introductions was any indication.

He was given a segment of a script to read, given a few minutes to look it over, and then worked through the brief dialogue with an assistant reading for the other character’s part. Then Yibo was asked a few questions about what he knew of the character, the novel, and what impressions he had of both. His honest answers, though short and to the point, seemed to be received well by the staff, and Yibo relaxed just a touch as the process was basically over and out of his hands at that point.

After the reading and questions were finished, the producer asked Yibo to have a seat to discuss a few things about the project.

“You need to be aware that this  _ will _ be a romance, as much as we can keep to the original content and still follow the guidelines to get the show on the air,” Yang Xia said. Her expression was open, but careful. Assessing. “How do you feel about that?”

Yibo gave her a flat look, not really understanding her question. “How do I feel about romance?”

“This show has two  _ male _ leads, Wang Yibo,” she reiterated slowly.

Yibo couldn’t contain the laugh that slipped from his throat, but his eyes remained guarded. “If I had a problem with two guys being together, do you think I would have kept trying so hard to get this part?”

Yang Xia huffed softly as a small smile pulled up the corner of her mouth. “I think you may be even better for this than I thought.”

Yibo smirked and raised an eyebrow slightly but held his tongue. He knew enough not to bluntly out himself to a producer, even if she  _ was _ loyally committed to a BL adaptation. Besides, if she had any questions about his sexuality there were about a hundred pictures from photo shoots (and occasional events) that made pretty clear he was obviously fine with cross-dressing and, if nothing else, was certainly “open-minded”.

“Look, I really want to do this. Really,” Yibo emphasized, leaning forward onto the table. “I’m willing to do whatever the script calls for.”

She didn’t need to know that he was already well aware of who’d been hired the previous week for the lead, and that Yibo was happy to do anything — including an abbreviated version of the novel’s extra chapters that he’d more than skimmed — with that man.

Or an unabbreviated version behind closed doors and without cameras present.

Hell, the cameras were negotiable at this point.

Yang Xia eyed him critically for a moment before she seemed to note the honesty in his eyes and nodded.

“Is the fact that it’s a BL story, and we may be pushing up against some lines, going to be a problem for your management company?” she asked. “I can’t promise you this show we’re making will ever make it to screens, and I want you to understand that. We don’t have a firm commitment yet from anyone.”

“So just don’t tell my company that,” Yibo answered flippantly.

“I don’t see how —”

Yibo cut her off with steel in his voice. “Whatever you do, don’t tell them there’s no guarantee and don’t give them too many details. Not until the contract is signed. They’ll never let me do this if they think it’s a risk to my career. Just talk around it, I’m sure you can do that.”

He took a deep breath, realizing how much he’d said and proud of himself for managing to not stutter at all. Belatedly, he prayed he didn’t come across too forcefully.

“So you do have some fire in you,” Yang Xia said with an amused smile. “That’s good, you’ll need that for Lan Wangji. He may be cold and quiet, but he’s passionate.”

Yibo looked at her with what he knew was unrestrained hope in his eyes, waiting with bated breath.

Yang Xia held out her hand across the table. “Welcome to the cast, Lan Zhan.”

Yibo knew the smile that spread over his face was absolutely ridiculous as he shook her hand and thanked her profusely.

He’d done it. He’d gotten the part. 

For a split second when she mentioned how soon filming was set to begin, the weight of his responsibilities crashed over Yibo. He already had his weekly Day Day Up job as well as a gig on a new idol talent show that was set to begin soon. And that didn’t even factor in the various modeling gigs that were crammed into his schedule constantly.

But Yibo didn’t care. He’d worked hard for this, and he  _ wanted _ it — almost more than he’d wanted anything, besides being able to dance and the desire to keep his band together. He would fly from Changsha to Beijing to wherever he needed to be every day if it meant getting to work on this show.

He was going to be working with Xiao Zhan. Finally.

He was going to be playing Xiao Zhan’s romantic co-lead! It was a once in a lifetime chance, and Yibo would do whatever he had to do to make it a reality.

**Author's Note:**

> I had quite a few requests for Xiao Zhan's side of the story, so I've posted what could be considered a [sequel here called "The Fall"](https://archiveofourown.org/works/24989353/chapters/60503494).
> 
> You can also find me on [Twitter](https://twitter.com/bjyxobsessed) posting thirst and sarcasm on the regular.
> 
> Kudos keep me going and comments are even better! What's your pre-CQL WangXiao theory?


End file.
